The most influential factor affecting the quality of a relationship is the amount of time spent together. Once you are actually in the company of one with whom you enjoy relationship, the quality of the time you spend together becomes significant.
Drive-by shootings follow a similar pattern: A car comes up to the subject, the car slows enough for the shooter to aim, a shot is fired and connection made, and the car speeds off once more.
Drive-by relationships involve people who meet up with each other, slow their schedules down enough to make a quick connection, then speed off again in their original direction of travel.
The speed at which the world operates has increased to a fever pitch. I admit that I usually try to squeeze the most out of every nanosecond. When I reheat a cup of coffee in the microwave and set the timer for ONE MINUTE, I immediately try to figure out what I can accomplish in the next 60 seconds. Half the time I get busy doing that little bitty project and completely forget I have coffee in the microwave.
At some point I remember and scurry back to the microwave. I set the timer for ONE MINUTE. And the cycle repeats.
Is silence appealing or appalling?
How long has it been since you walked a lake shore without a cell phone? Wrote a letter? Read a book in the quiet of an evening with only the chirp of a cricket or bird song to break the silken silence? Do such interludes of peace sound appealing or appalling? Do you hunger for the luxury of time or do you get antsy after the maddening vacuum of the first 20 seconds?
Are you pleased with the quality of your relationship with those you love most? Spouse, children, parents, friends, pets or horse — how about God? If you can’t stand being alone in the quiet it’s a good bet you and the Lord may be sharing a drive-by relationship.
Most of us have experienced conversations with someone who wouldn’t or couldn’t give us their complete attention. Can you remember standing face to face with someone who responded to you verbally but kept looking over your shoulder for someone a bit more important or interesting to speak to? Most of us have been on both ends of that drive-by experience. Today it’s far more likely to be conversing with someone who refuses to stop texting or checking Facebook and email on their smart phone.
Is your online status more important than real relationships?
Your friend from the gym may not be able to give you her complete attention because she’s busy telling all her online friends that she’s meeting you. Some people read about God in their Bible while waiting for the microwave to ding, but never take a moment to stop everything else and simply seek His presence. Surely we need to devote more than the time it takes to heat a cup of coffee if we’re going to spend time with the Creator of the universe. So… we resolve to get to it when we have more time available.
Someone once said that it is easier to be busy doing God’s work than to be quiet in His presence. Multi-tasking should be a solitary pursuit. When you divide your focus between interaction with someone else, your social media, and some task or other – you are promoting just one more drive-by relationship. How often do you multi-task when spending time in God’s presence? Are you looking for someone a bit more important or interesting to speak to?
Why don’t you put a cup of coffee or tea in the microwave and set the time for ONE MINUTE. Use that time to watch this 60 second Amazing Grays Ministry video – What one thing is more important than anything else in building great relationship?
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For more information about Amazing Grays, Amazing Grace: Pursuing relationship with God, horses, and one another, click the BOOKS tab at the top of this page or visit Amazon.com.